GUILTY

I am guilty for making her cry,
I admit it,
I thought I was gifted,
Until I realized,
I wasn’t,
Buzzing in my ear,
Are my fears,
My worries,
They are my enemies,
I shouldn’t fear,
Because I created them as friends,
My many men,
Planted to keep me safe,
But I feel bad,
As if I gave no other choice,
As if I didn’t decide to fight myself,
To win,
Her heart,
Over and over again,
Guilt,
Painted on my face,
That stain I can’t erase,
But live with,
Hoping and wishing for forgiveness,
Not just from her,
But from myself,
For being bad,
Maybe good,
For being who I am.